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Repost: The Rudest Thing Anyone Can Say

Posted on November 28, 2014 by funnygurl2

This was originally posted on January 29, 2014, but seems more fitting at this pushy time of year…

Original Link here: https://imnotstalkingyou.com/2014/01/29/the-rudest-thing-anyone-can-say/

“Excuse me.”

According to dictionary.com, it is an idiom, “used as a polite expression, as when addressing a stranger, when interrupting or disagreeing with someone, or to request repetition of what has just been said.”

I do not see it as polite at all.

1. How can you say it is ever “polite” to interrupt or disagree with someone? That is always going to be seen as negative by the person you are disagreeing with, no matter how much sugar you put on it.

2. I do not ever hear excuse me used out of “politeness”.

Used out of anger and impatience, mostly.

A perfect meme to illustrate my exact point.

A perfect meme to illustrate my exact point!

The customers at the grocery store who want to get past you are not saying it to be polite. They are not bothering to waste their breath on a full statement, such as, “Excuse me, may I please get by?” They are just barking out “excuse me”, then trying to squeeze between the two carts that are still in front of them at full speed. “Excuse me” is not a magic phrase meaning “everyone get the hell out of my way!” If it is the day before Thanksgiving and you are in the baking aisle at Meijer, “excuse me” isn’t going to get you anywhere. If there are people with carts in front of the people with carts who are blocking you, THEY ARE BLOCKED! Incessantly repeating “excuse me” like a broken record is not going to make the rapture come and beam people out of your way. Trust me, if they could get out of your way and away from you snarling those two rudest of words, they would.

I try not to use “excuse me” ever. Sometimes I use it in a store just to get someone’s attention. But my voice is always too quiet, and then I just feel dumb that I talked and no one heard me. I feel like I suddenly became invisible.

And really, in that context, to be perfectly honest, I am using “excuse me” to tell a stranger “you are in my way.” And that is how we are all using that expression. Be honest here. Unless you are trying to give someone back the $100 bill they just dropped, you are not using it as a courtesy or out of kindness. You are being rude and pushy and have the same “get out of my way” attitude as everyone else.

Maybe it is just me, but I always think of “excuse me” as the rudest thing anyone could say to me. It makes me just want to stab them.

The second rudest?

Probably, “Here, have a tissue.” Ack!

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What I Learned This Week – 10/26/14

Posted on October 26, 2014 by funnygurl2

Tonight I learned not to judge the middle-aged woman in her pajamas pumping gas at the gas station. She may have spent all morning trying to get the checkbook balanced, and after three hours had to settle for a 10 cent discrepancy.

One pair HAS actually been to yoga class...

One pair of mine HAS actually been to yoga class…

I learned not to judge the woman in yoga pants pushing the grocery cart around Meijer. It is quite possible she was wearing real clothes earlier in the day the first time she left the house. That would also be before she helped her husband pick up leaves, and got covered in dirt, rotting leaves, and dog poop.  Also, before the dog barfed up a combo of her own poo and grass in the laundry room.  Twice.

I learned not to judge the weary-looking mother staring blankly at the grocery store shelf. It is very likely that this is the only time she has been at the store without her preschooler in a very long time, and needs to take advantage of this by picking up gifts for him for his upcoming birthday and Christmas. She might just be racking her brain to remember what size Lightning McQueen he was most interested in three days ago when they were at this very same store together.

YEEESSSSS.....

YEEESSSSS…..

For all you know, that woman has worked for the last 6 days straight. She could have bitten off more than she can chew. She misses her family. She misses her dog.

I learned not to judge the woman with her hair quickly escaping her pony tail and no makeup out in public at 9:00PM. She knows damn well that she has no right to be out. But she also spent all of her day doing so many other chores, that she still needs to buy groceries, including supplies for her son’s lunch at daycare tomorrow. And when she arrives home, she still will need to put away the groceries, pack said lunch for the son, pack one for herself, and tuck the tiny night owl into bed.

Then eat some Halloween candy.

Then type up and publish a blog post.

Then start reading The Perks of Being a Wallflower as preparation to publish her own YA book, hopefully before midnight.

WEEK-candy

This week I learned that I am totally that woman. You can judge me all you want, but I am drained.  Stay-at-home moms always argue that the work they do is REAL work.  And I wouldn’t argue that point, having done it for almost 2 years myself.  But, it is DIFFERENT work.  For all the days when the house ends up more of a disaster at the end of the day than when you started, there are many more days than not where you feel a sense of accomplishment of actually finishing the dishes, making a semi-nutritional and/or delicious dinner, or spending an actual 10 minutes of quality time with your child.  Working full time makes those tiny accomplishments impossible.

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The Rudest Thing Anyone Can Say

Posted on January 29, 2014 by funnygurl2

“Excuse me.”

According to dictionary.com, it is an idiom, “used as a polite expression, as when addressing a stranger, when interrupting or disagreeing with someone, or to request repetition of what has just been said.”

I do not see it as polite at all.

1. How can you say it is ever “polite” to interrupt or disagree with someone? That is always going to be seen as negative by the person you are disagreeing with, no matter how much sugar you put on it.

2. I do not ever hear excuse me used out of “politeness”.

Used out of anger and impatience, mostly.

A perfect meme to illustrate my exact point.

A perfect meme to illustrate my exact point!

The customers at the grocery store who want to get past you are not saying it to be polite. They are not bothering to waste their breath on a full statement, such as, “Excuse me, may I please get by?” They are just barking out “excuse me”, then trying to squeeze between the two carts that are still in front of them at full speed. “Excuse me” is not a magic phrase meaning “everyone get the hell out of my way!” If it is the day before Thanksgiving and you are in the baking aisle at Meijer, “excuse me” isn’t going to get you anywhere. If there are people with carts in front of the people with carts who are blocking you, THEY ARE BLOCKED! Incessantly repeating “excuse me” like a broken record is not going to make the rapture come and beam people out of your way. Trust me, if they could get out of your way and away from you snarling those two rudest of words, they would.

I try not to use “excuse me” ever. Sometimes I use it in a store just to get someone’s attention. But my voice is always too quiet, and then I just feel dumb that I talked and no one heard me. I feel like I suddenly became invisible.

And really, in that context, to be perfectly honest, I am using “excuse me” to tell a stranger “you are in my way.” And that is how we are all using that expression. Be honest here. Unless you are trying to give someone back the $100 bill they just dropped, you are not using it as a courtesy or out of kindness. You are being rude and pushy and have the same “get out of my way” attitude as everyone else.

Maybe it is just me, but I always think of “excuse me” as the rudest thing anyone could say to me. It makes me just want to stab them.

The second rudest?

Probably, “Here, have a tissue.” Ack!

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Friday Funny

Posted on January 17, 2014 by funnygurl2

Happy Friday Everyone!

Opti-Mist: Spray this on my glasses every mornin', my outlook still doesn't improve

Opti-Mist: Spray this on my glasses every mornin’, my outlook still doesn’t improve

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If You Miss The Days of MicroMagic, Try These

Posted on September 26, 2013 by funnygurl2

I wrote on Tuesday about how much I used to eat and enjoy MicroMagic products.

If it is microwave hamburgers you are looking for, you do have a few choices still available in stores.

I had to go especially buy one to take a picture of for this post because, in the past, I kept eating them before I could get a picture.

I had to go especially buy one to take a picture of for this post because, in the past, I kept eating them before I could get a picture.

Pita Cheeseburgers made by Kangaroo Brands, Inc. remind me a lot of MicroMagic burgers (I evaluated the cheeseburger variety for the sake of my hunger, and this post.) They still possess the microwave convenience that you enjoyed of yesteryear. I will warn you right off the bat you only get a half a burger per package. The burger is also quite thin, but this allows it to heat more evenly. It has a good fake-smoke taste. Since it comes in a pita, there is no bun to get overcooked. They are good to get your burger fix on, if you only want a half a burger. (I usually eat one for lunch, then supplement with chips or cookies.) If you are a big guy, you would definitely want to pack at least two into your lunch box.

They are good, but I must admit that the cheese-like substance on it that doesn’t melt in the microwave does disturb me.

Meijer Frozen Microwavable Cheeseburger

Meijer Frozen Microwavable Cheeseburger

If you live where there is a Meijer store near you, you are in luck. Meijer had great frozen hamburgers, cheeseburgers, and chicken sandwiches. Great, ya know, considering it is a frozen, then microwaved highly processed burger.

What to do if that bothers you?

Put bacon on it!

Oh yes, they offer a bacon cheeseburger as well (Although the bacon does not come out of the microwave crispy:(

Nothing fancy here. They come on traditional sesame seed buns. and if you catch one of Meijer’s famous “10 for $10 and the 11th is FREE” sales, well, then that makes these burgers cheaper than pita burgers or McDonald’s–with the bonus that they will survive in your freezer for months! Perfect in case of an unanticipated zombie apocalypse.

Of course, there is always the option of White Castle frozen burgers. They satisfy my craving sometimes, but I feel like they are an acquired taste (READ AS: grease & onions).

Ore-Ida Extra Crispy Easy Fries

Ore-Ida Extra Crispy Easy Fries

I believe the only major microwave french fries available right now are Ore-Ida Extra Crispy Easy Golden Fries.  They are a good facsimile of the grease and cardboard taste of the old MicroMagic.

I knew of the burgers and fries listed above before I started this post.  They are actually what made me nostaligic for the old MicroMagic of yesteryear.  But I didn’t know of any companies currently selling microwaveable milkshakes in stores across the country. And even if there were, I do not think they would be as tempting to buy without the microwave fast food branded trifecta that MicroMagic represented.

Then I walked into the grocery store tonight and found this:

Homemade Milk Shakes

Homemade Milk Shakes

I found Homemade Brand Microwave Milkshakes.

Right down the road at my local grocery store, I was able to assemble this:

Yum!

Yum!   Nostalgia (As close at it gets, anyway!)

I taste-tested the chocolate milkshakes.  They were good.  I erred on the side of less microwave time, so it was still thick.  It wasn’t super creamy, but definitely hit the spot.  Well, the half of the cup I managed to wrangle away from M, my two-and-a-half year old anyway.

I also found a company called Cold Cow Ice Cream that is apparently putting in freezer/microwave combo display units in convenience stores across the country to satisfy your need for sweet that cannot be satisfied with candy bars or the usual ice cream novelties found in party stores, or the ice cream store that is likely right next door or down the block. I am very glad they did not have one of these in my store when I worked there. I would have eaten one every day. There website has a “milkshake finder” option to find the space age milkshake vending contraption closest to you.

That is all for today.

Happy unhealthy snacking everyone!

I found this humorous how-to on YouTube.com. I thought I would share.

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