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Repost: The Rudest Thing Anyone Can Say

Posted on November 28, 2014 by funnygurl2

This was originally posted on January 29, 2014, but seems more fitting at this pushy time of year…

Original Link here: https://imnotstalkingyou.com/2014/01/29/the-rudest-thing-anyone-can-say/

“Excuse me.”

According to dictionary.com, it is an idiom, “used as a polite expression, as when addressing a stranger, when interrupting or disagreeing with someone, or to request repetition of what has just been said.”

I do not see it as polite at all.

1. How can you say it is ever “polite” to interrupt or disagree with someone? That is always going to be seen as negative by the person you are disagreeing with, no matter how much sugar you put on it.

2. I do not ever hear excuse me used out of “politeness”.

Used out of anger and impatience, mostly.

A perfect meme to illustrate my exact point.

A perfect meme to illustrate my exact point!

The customers at the grocery store who want to get past you are not saying it to be polite. They are not bothering to waste their breath on a full statement, such as, “Excuse me, may I please get by?” They are just barking out “excuse me”, then trying to squeeze between the two carts that are still in front of them at full speed. “Excuse me” is not a magic phrase meaning “everyone get the hell out of my way!” If it is the day before Thanksgiving and you are in the baking aisle at Meijer, “excuse me” isn’t going to get you anywhere. If there are people with carts in front of the people with carts who are blocking you, THEY ARE BLOCKED! Incessantly repeating “excuse me” like a broken record is not going to make the rapture come and beam people out of your way. Trust me, if they could get out of your way and away from you snarling those two rudest of words, they would.

I try not to use “excuse me” ever. Sometimes I use it in a store just to get someone’s attention. But my voice is always too quiet, and then I just feel dumb that I talked and no one heard me. I feel like I suddenly became invisible.

And really, in that context, to be perfectly honest, I am using “excuse me” to tell a stranger “you are in my way.” And that is how we are all using that expression. Be honest here. Unless you are trying to give someone back the $100 bill they just dropped, you are not using it as a courtesy or out of kindness. You are being rude and pushy and have the same “get out of my way” attitude as everyone else.

Maybe it is just me, but I always think of “excuse me” as the rudest thing anyone could say to me. It makes me just want to stab them.

The second rudest?

Probably, “Here, have a tissue.” Ack!

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The Rudest Thing Anyone Can Say

Posted on January 29, 2014 by funnygurl2

“Excuse me.”

According to dictionary.com, it is an idiom, “used as a polite expression, as when addressing a stranger, when interrupting or disagreeing with someone, or to request repetition of what has just been said.”

I do not see it as polite at all.

1. How can you say it is ever “polite” to interrupt or disagree with someone? That is always going to be seen as negative by the person you are disagreeing with, no matter how much sugar you put on it.

2. I do not ever hear excuse me used out of “politeness”.

Used out of anger and impatience, mostly.

A perfect meme to illustrate my exact point.

A perfect meme to illustrate my exact point!

The customers at the grocery store who want to get past you are not saying it to be polite. They are not bothering to waste their breath on a full statement, such as, “Excuse me, may I please get by?” They are just barking out “excuse me”, then trying to squeeze between the two carts that are still in front of them at full speed. “Excuse me” is not a magic phrase meaning “everyone get the hell out of my way!” If it is the day before Thanksgiving and you are in the baking aisle at Meijer, “excuse me” isn’t going to get you anywhere. If there are people with carts in front of the people with carts who are blocking you, THEY ARE BLOCKED! Incessantly repeating “excuse me” like a broken record is not going to make the rapture come and beam people out of your way. Trust me, if they could get out of your way and away from you snarling those two rudest of words, they would.

I try not to use “excuse me” ever. Sometimes I use it in a store just to get someone’s attention. But my voice is always too quiet, and then I just feel dumb that I talked and no one heard me. I feel like I suddenly became invisible.

And really, in that context, to be perfectly honest, I am using “excuse me” to tell a stranger “you are in my way.” And that is how we are all using that expression. Be honest here. Unless you are trying to give someone back the $100 bill they just dropped, you are not using it as a courtesy or out of kindness. You are being rude and pushy and have the same “get out of my way” attitude as everyone else.

Maybe it is just me, but I always think of “excuse me” as the rudest thing anyone could say to me. It makes me just want to stab them.

The second rudest?

Probably, “Here, have a tissue.” Ack!

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Sh*t My Mom Says

Posted on March 7, 2012 by funnygurl2

My mom is rude to me. Like, all the time. And I can’t call her on it or tell her to stop because then she will be like “I can’t say anything to you. You always take it the wrong way.” and start crying. I am the only frickin’ family she has and her primary mode of transportation. You would think she could be just a little nicer to me.

My mother is the most negative person I have ever met. She also has a very powerful law of attraction. In 2006, she was diagnosed with stage four kidney cancer and told she had two months to live. She had the kidney removed, had virtually no treatment, and is still here cancer free today. I believe she only survived because she wanted to be alive longer so she could continue to find things to be miserable about.

When my husband asks me what she says to get me so mad and fired up, I usually can’t remember. But with texting, it is much easier to have examples handy. (I taught my mom to text so that I could talk to her on the phone for shorter periods of time and less frequently.)

Whoops…I think my blog might have just turned into therapy.

Examples from Texts

2011
MOM: Warn me if you are going to find religion.

2/12/12
MOM: Since you haven’t bothered to call me back I have to assume you don’t give a shit that I fell on the hard floor in a public place humiliating & hurting myself. 8:09PM
ME: I couldn’t get your voicemail until 8pm & you told me you were fine. 8:10PM
MOM: I believe I said I survived not that I was fine. It scared the crap out of me. I shook much for 5 min after & lightly thereafter. I hurt & did laundry. 8:17PM

2/15/12
MOM: Do you want to watch Columbo? 3:00PM
ME: No. 3:21PM
MOM: I take offense that everything I like you automatically reject. Everything 3:41PM
ME: I like Scott Hamilton. 3:42PM

2/15/12
MOM: Maybe before the end of Feb we could go in am to Martins & then have lunch. We might even do Bobs. Dutch of course. What think? 5:24PM
ME: It will probably have to be after J gets his truck fixed. Not sure when that will be. 5:26PM
MOM: Didn’t know it was sick. What minimum $400 part does it need? 5:30PM
ME: Not sure. 7:30PM
MOM: So J goes to work with the only working vehicle & you are home all day with the baby & can’t go anywhere. Welcome to the life of a 50’s housewife. Ha. 8:58PM
ME: I have nowhere to go anyway. 9:16PM
MOM: Depressing isn’t it? 9:19PM
ME: No it’s nice 7:07AM
MOM: Don’t start giving Tupperware parties 9:34PM
ME: I can do whatever the fuck I want to do. 7:07AM

I’m not stalking you. is NOW ON FACEBOOK! “Like” that I’m not stalking you and get an update when there is a new post to read. (It is sort of like YOU are stalking ME.)

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The Church of Common Decency

Posted on November 30, 2011 by funnygurl2

The Golden Rule: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

What if there was a church where you didn’t have to believe in God? What if all you had to believe in was the goodness of each other? Believe in being nice to each other?

I want to promote people being good for the sake of being good. Not because they need to get into Heaven or stay out of Hell or stay on a deity’s good side. Everyone would just be nice to each other because it feels good, and for the potential universal karmic payback. If you are nice to someone today when they need it, maybe someone else will help you when you need it.

That is my new dream.

I must admit that this idea came out of experiencing the driving habits of inconsiderate drivers over and over again. My main example is when I was in the Meijer parking lot and had my back door open on my car. I was buckling my infant son into his carseat. A woman came out of the store, got into the van next to me, and proceeded to back out. She did this as I still stood there with my car door open and my easily squishable body behind it. I got so angry. How could someone take the chance of injuring two people and going to jail, rather than sit in her van for two minutes? Asked like that, doesn’t it seem obvious what the correct choice would be?

I had a very similar situation a few months earlier. My senior citizen mother was getting out of my car at the bank. She was getting her purse and her cane, the front door open behind her. A woman came out of the bank, got into her car directly beside us, and proceeded to back out. When she had parked, her front tires were turned. This caused her car to head right for my car door and my mom. It being summer, the woman had her window open and heard my exclamation, something like “Hey” (short for “Hey, what the hell are you doing?). Of course, she had been only looking behind her, with no regard for who she was about to squish. I think she gave a half-hearted apology, straightened her wheel, and back out the rest of the way.

More than just vehicle etiquette, there are tons of other situations in our daily life where we could help a stranger and it would create a big pay off. I guess maybe it could also be the Church of Common Courtesy. The mission statement could be something like:

Church of Common Courtesy
Our mission is to promote the good that is in everyone, encourage helping one another as much as your means and abilities will allow, and discourage evil and rude behavior.

I guess the problem is, people don’t like to be nice and polite. It is not a human’s natural state. That is why we have laws and religion already–to force people to follow the rules and get along when they don’t want to.

Ah, but a girl can dream…

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