What I Learned This Week – 9/2/12


What I learned this week was that spending the whole day with my mother won’t kill me. But there was at least one time I could have strangled her, she frustrated me so.

We took my mom with us to the Toledo Zoo, along with my husband, myself, and my 21 month old son. I know that she didn’t look at is as “we were going to the zoo and she came along”, therefore she should accommadate us. She saw it as “we took her to the zoo” and the whole day should be about her. We had a few run ins, but we managed. The fact that it was probably the last 95 degree (That’s 35 in Celsius for my dear Canadian readers!) day of summer probably didn’t help. And that every week I take my mom grocery shopping, and I mostly let her run that show. But I felt like she needed to give and take a little with us at the zoo.

I learned she is not good at saving seats in a busy cafe. She also complained all day about how much it cost to rent a motorized scooter. (She may have a point. She was charged $35. According to the zoo website, she should have only been charged $25!)

All in all, we all survived. And I have lived to blog another day (that is, if Comcast can keep a signal at my house for more than 12hrs a day!).

CAUTION! Gratuitous tortoise sex below!

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Why I Blog

I got the idea to write this post from a comment I left for Friffle Thoughts in response to her post “Are All Bloggers Writers?”:

I used to think I wanted to write fiction/novels/short stories as a career someday. Then I tried it and realized it was hard work, like every other job. I didn’t like that. I stopped.

But then I discovered blogging. Blogging to me is like the free-writing I used to do in high school English class. It is easy. It clears my mind. My “blogging voice” is exactly what runs through my head. And once I write it down, then I don’t have to hold that experience/memory in my head anymore (it is getting very crowded in there).

My real inspiration for my blog was Tina Fey’s book “Bossypants”. Afterall, it is really just a free-write of events in her life. And it sold millions!!!

FYI-I love your friffles of thought.

And to expand on that tiny little comment:

If I am in a writing mood (i.e. writing about a topic I am interested in and for my own enjoyment and not for, say, work), the words just flow to me. They just pour out of my head and through my hand onto the paper. I feel as though someone else writes through me. I get frustrated that I cannot write fast enough to keep up with my thoughts. I would be a terrible writer of books. I usually believe that the first batch of words I capture on paper are the best and I do not like to edit them after (except fixing spelling and grammatical errors). In school, they always wanted you to have multiple drafts of big papers. Often all my drafts looked very similar.

Without realizing it, I often think in my head as though I am writing or telling a story to someone else. Often, I can think of a blog post in my head multiple times before I actually have the chance to write it down. When I do write it, it will be almost identical to the first time I ran the thought through my head. Yes, I like to write my posts out in long hand. I can type faster than writing, but then I get lots of typos and they slow me down and make me lose my train of thought. (I recommend Uni-Ball Jetstream 1.0 Bold pens. They flow quickly and thickly.) And I might not get to type it up for another month. And when I do, I can anticipate the next words or sentences while typing–because the words came out of my brain in the first place.

With blogging, there is also that delicious chance at the monster that is fame. Someone might read my blog. Anyone might read my blog. Someone who reads it might pass it on to another. A link might get posted somewhere else. My writing might get re-posted. Someone famous might read my blog. Someone in publishing might see and want to give me a book deal. Someone in news might see it and want to include me in a newscast. (Hey, it can happen. I take full credit for badly influencing my asbestos friend, lazyhippiemama, to begin blogging and she ended up on HuffPost Live!)

I am someone who has anxiety, but secretly yearns to be famous and known. I love the entertainment industry. I read Entertainment Weekly every week cover to cover. I went to college and studied Radio and TV Broadcasting. On radio, you can be heard by millions but hide behind the microphone. On television, you can hide behind the camera. On my blog, I can hide behind my computer screen. I can blur my face out in photos one week if I feel like being anonymous. The next week I can leave my face alone if I am feeling brave and confident in my writing and topic.

Most of all, I can get all these words and experiences out of my head! I am almost 37 years old and running out of room up there. I have trouble remembering anything, especially since I was pregnant and had my son. I thought not being able to hold a thought was just a “pregnancy” thing. But for me, it seems to be just a “parent” thing.

I used to watch the great sitcoms of the 80’s and always say “I could write that.” And except for the fact that I am too scared of big cities to move to L.A., I think I could have been good at that. I think it was my secret career dream. I should have listened the night it presented itself to me in a dream. In the dream, I was working with a group of people to create a new TV show. It was all last minute and came together very quickly (Yes. I am aware shows take years to develop and get on air–DREAM, remember?) So quickly, that when they put the show together, they wanted to give me a vanity card at the end, but I hadn’t created one. In the dream, I never knew they created one for me until I watched my first episode and saw it at the end. The other creators knew I liked to cross-stitch (I actually do in reality, but haven’t done it in years), so my vanity card was done in cross-stitch. If I ever knew what it said, I can’t remember. I have never forgotten that dream. And I know if I ever do create a series, that is what I will use.

An example of a simple cross-stitch

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I thought they would have found the missing boys by now

I had my son the day after Thanksgiving, 2010. We were in the hospital for four days. I felt like I was on a vacation for those four days. A vacation where they cut you open, remove a person, don’t let you sleep or leave the room. As you can guess, I lost touch with the outside world over that long weekend.

The missing Skelton boys


So when I got home, I was surprised to hear about this big story in the local news that was in full swing. A father had failed to return his three sons to their mother on the day after Thanksgiving in Morenci, Michigan. Pictures of the three boys angelic faces were plastered all over the news and businesses. The father gave some bull-shit story about giving them to some woman and that they were safe. Big groups of volunteers searched the rural farm country and woods near Morenci. My husband’s best friend was one of them. But not a trace was found. I was concerned for my husband, because he goes deer and turkey hunting in that area. I didn’t want him to be the one to discover their bodies in some secluded wooded spot. But he hasn’t gone hunting since my son was born. (My husband has been a little busy nurturing our offspring.)

Andrew Skelton


The police department has since declared the case a homicide investigation. In lieu of finding the bodies, the father was charged with kidnapping. I know cases can go unsolved indefinitely, but…I thought they would have found the missing boys by now. Whose “they”? Anyone. The police, a farmer, a concerned citizen. It is coming up on two years since they went missing. That is two spring plantings. That is almost two harvests. That is several hunting seasons. Floods. Drought. It seems like something should have unearthed them BY NOW! I can understand one body laying undiscovered, but three?

Alexander Skelton


I wanted to write about this case because it bothers me that it is still unsolved, as I’m positive it bothers the Skelton boys’ mother, family, and anyone who heard and remembers the news story. (Obviously it doesn’t bother the ass-hole dad who isn’t talking.) This story makes me feel all (to quote Phoebe Buffay) floopy inside. In a bad way. I believe it might be because it could have just been another news story to me. Except at a time when I was just bringing a life into the world and just beginning to learn to be a parent, all that was ripped away from someone else–threefold. So, read my blog, take a good look at their pictures. If you see anything suspicious with three kids that look like them, report it. If you have lots of land or unused outbuildings, give them a look. Especially if you live in Lenawee County, Michigan or nearby Fulton County, Ohio.

Tanner Skelton


Here is a link to the Facebook page dedicated to finding the boys: Missing ~ Skelton Brothers, Morenci, Michigan

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Election 2012

I read somewhere the other day (And I don’t know where, but a quick Google search returns many results with similar factoids) that only 5% of the people who will actually go vote in the United States presidential election are undecided.

So, that means, all these millions and billions of dollars being raised and spent on attack ads and campaign stops are only for the tiny undecided 5%? How crazy. What a waste of time for the rest of us. All those unwanted television commercials, phone calls, and junk left on our front doors.

I have my own theory on how people decide who to vote for in the presidential election. I believe everyone has their one big issue, and they side with the candidate who believes the same way they do on that one issue. I think two of the big examples are probably abortion and gun control. Sure, maybe some people use health insurance or taxes or some other point as their main issue. But I think there might be some truth to my theory. Maybe voters don’t even realize they are doing it.

I will admit right here that my deciding issue is abortion. I decided a long time ago that this issue would decide my vote more than anything else. I am pro-choice (although I usually call myself “pro-death”). I believe we are in the middle of a terrible over-population problem that will someday soon cripple this planet. I also believe women should have the right to do what they want with their own bodies, within general reason of course (ex. No abortions after a certain trimester is agreeable with me). I would not vote for a candidate who is pro-life. No matter what their views on other issues were.

This is why, when my asbestos friend talks about running for president someday, I probably would not vote for her. I would be her campaign manager and keep her organized and on schedule (because we both know she would need that!). I would make sure all her necessary forms got filed in triplicate. I would make sure she had a valid birth certificate so no one could claim she was really a Canadian or something. But I couldn’t cast my vote for her.

PLEASE NOTE: This is not a post about abortion. It is a post about theories on how people decide their vote. Thank you.

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What I Learned This Week – 8/26/12

I learned that it is awesome to have an anniversary date with my husband with NO CHILD with us! We haven’t both been out together without him since before he was conceived (well, I guess the first 40 weeks don’t count). He is 21 months old…TODAY! I felt rushed, because we had to get back before he fell asleep (we failed). But we had a great time.

Thanks again to LazyHippieMama for babysitting.

I also learned that it is awesome to go on a family play day out together (along with our favorite little blue engine). We went to Day Out With Thomas at the Crossroads Village and Huckleberry Railroad in Flint, Michigan.

When I was a kid, we had a brochure in my house for Crossroads Village and Huckleberry Railroad, that we had picked up on some vacation Up North. I used to stare at that brochure and wish we could go there. How sad is that? At that time I had never been on a full-size train ride and had not been pulled by a steam engine. I have done both those things in the almost 30 years since. But, I had still never gone to Crossroads Village and Huckleberry Railroad. I sort of assumed they had gone out of business, because railroads have expensive upkeep.

Then last summer a friend of mine recommended this Thomas event. I figured that my son was sort of too young to get it last year, so we didn’t go. But this year we went. And WE HAVE CREATED A MONSTER! My son can’t say “Thomas” or “train”, but he sure did say “toot-toot” a lot. I witnessed the awesome power of licensed characters and the merchandising machine first hand. But we all had great fun. And the village had lots more to do than I would have thought. We didn’t arrive til 11am, and I felt rushed. We didn’t get to see it all.

When we got home, my son grabbed all his Thomas and Friends books and looked at them more carefully than before, no doubt remembering his awesome day. At least he isn’t old enough to ask for a trip to the Island of Sodor yet.

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