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I’m Not Stalking You’s 5th Anniversary!

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When I started writing on this blog, I barely knew what a blog was. I had been working for 12 years for the same company that was about to go out of business, leaving me jobless, and an infant that needed major surgery. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life, although I was already well into my 30s.

Happy Birthday to INSY, Happy Birthday to INSY...

Happy Birthday to INSY, Happy Birthday to INSY…

In the intervening five years, I had a job for 21 months that I liked that progressed into one that I couldn’t stand to stay with. Now I have finally settled somewhere closer to home that I hope to stay at for a very long time. My young son actually had to have two surgeries to accomplish what one should have done, but today he is happy and healthy and annoying me on a consistent basis, as any growing child testing his boundaries should be. (Doesn’t make it any easier though.) My family lost a dog. We have struggled, but I think that glow up there might be the light at the end of the tunnel.

Oh, and I wrote three books. And as I have said before, I don’t think I would have accomplished that if I hadn’t started emptying my chaotic brain out into this little blog first.

I welcome you to click on my comical categories or explore with the search bar my amassed collection of 520 posts. Don’t know where to start? Below are links to my most popular posts and some of my favorites.

And here is to the next five years. Make a five year plan, you say? I wouldn’t even know where to begin.

Most Popular Posts

Boxelder Bugs Must Die

Homefront

MicroMagic [Fine] Frozen Foods

Kiddie City

The O.C.

__________

My Favorite Posts

Dead Dad Movies, Part 1

Dead Dad Movies, Part 2

My Favorite TV Shows

Punky Brewster

Matthew Perry

And, well, since I’m feeling like anyone who is reading this post deserves a little gift, here it is. I have talked about it for a while. This is as close as you are probably ever going to get to seeing me karaoke Vanilla Ice’s “Ice, Ice Baby.” Don’t ask me why I feel more comfortable releasing this on the Internet to a bunch of ruthless strangers than I do a roomful of drunks who would forget me tomorrow, but I do. It is a public speaking anxiety thing, which is rendered temporarily ineffective when confronted with audio or visual equipment, rather than a physical crowd being present. Hence, the Communications degree in Radio and Television Broadcasting. Oh, and remind me to disable comments on this video.

This is a long time coming. Years ago, I bought the karaoke track of “Ice Ice Baby” off of iTunes to practice with. But I still had no words, and that version cut off the third verse, which is my favorite and the one I am best at. At some point in the intervening years I Googled the lyrics and saved them on my flash drive, where they have traveled around aimlessly since. I found a karaoke track with lyrics on YouTube and made a practice video one day. That seemed like only a few months ago, Christmas maybe? Nope. That was last APRIL! I had the idea that this may be a great stunt for INSY’s anniversary…then my mom brain took over and I forgot until like Monday.

So, I had to cram. I have been rapping the words to this song for 26 years—some of them being the WRONG words. Oy. It is hard to untrain myself. I will always say: “Falling on the concrete real fast” as “Fallin’ on the concrete grill fat.” Mmm…grill fat. Anyone hungry for McDonald’s?

Follow the romantic entanglements of The Riley Sisters in my books:
Be Careful What You Wish ForAVAILABLE NOW!
When You Least Expect It THE CONTINUING ROMANCE!
The Wind Could Blow a BugWHERE IT ALL BEGAN!

My Latest Obsession: Sam Hunt

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People who read this page often may have figured out by now that I like to listen to a variety of music. I like pop, alternative, 80’s country, and white boy rappers (see my past posts on Kid Rock and Vanilla Ice).

But I usually am not that interested in current country music. Once Garth retired and I discovered Good Charlotte and Kid Rock, country pretty much fell off my radar entirely. I knew that I liked Joe Nichols, purely because many of his early songs I kept mistaking for George Strait. But I figured the King wouldn’t sing a song called “Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off.” And since when did George become the King anyway? He was just another artist (albiet the awesomest one) when I was still listening.

Last fall I found an affection for Luke Bryan’s “Play It Again”. And I played it again and again. But I didn’t search out any of this other songs.

This spring, I was lucky enough to be invited to a Garth Brooks concert. It reawakened my love of the country I grew up on.

While removing wallpaper with pink roses on it (a very long process), I tuned to a country station. I realized they played the same songs and artists over and over again all day long. But that forced me to begin to recognize the voices of Blake Shelton and Florida Georgia Line. I became familiar with some of Tim McGraw and Brad Paisley’s previous releases.

Sam Hunt

Sam Hunt

But there was one song that didn’t fit with the others. Because it was better. And many of the lyrics were talked, rather than sang.  It got stuck in my head. I heard the artist’s name, then instantly forgot it again. I can still only remember it by thinking of how it rhymes with a swear word.

The song was “Take Your Time” by Sam Hunt.

I watched the video, which is powerful, but doesn’t specifically match the lyrics of the song. I learned that Sam is hot. And I can’t believe they let guys with weird Macklemore hair have hit songs on country radio nowadays. My, how times has changed while I wasn’t paying attention.

Doing a little wiki research on him, I learned he is a pretty accomplished songwriter. I found out that his influences include R&B, but he wanted to write about the themes of where he grew up in Georgia, which led him to country. While I believe “Take Your Time” works on country radio, I thought to myself that it could be played on adult-contemporary as well. And then I found an article where it appears that exact thing is happening in some markets.

I am still mining through his songs on YouTube, but one called “Speakers” is particularly edgy and sexy.

“You Can Leave The Night On” is another good song of his. “House Party” and “Raised On It” are kind of generic to me. I think he excels when he embraces his uniqueness. I realize being different is a big risk in any music genre…but it is also the one that can pay off the most.

My first book, The Wind Could Blow a Bug is NOW AVAILABLE!

PURCHASE as a Paperback or eBook on Amazon.com TODAY.

If I Had The Guts To Karaoke, I Would Sing. . .

Ice, Ice Baby by Vanilla Ice

While to the world I just look like a little geeky white chick with glasses, I am secretly an awesome rapper. Well, for that one song anyway. And a song called the “Punky Power Rap” I invented in the 6th grade. But no one should ever really hear that song beyond my asbestos friend and my husband. And even they just smile and nod.

How did I get so good at singing “Ice, Ice Baby” around my house? Because I have been practicing for 20 years, that’s why. Several years ago I even bought the music-only karaoke track off iTunes so I could practice in my car. The problem with that is that I didn’t have a copy of the correct lyrics in front of me at all times. I am pretty sure that over 20 years I have mutated some of the lyrics from their original form.

The other night I dreamed that I was writing rap songs with Vanilla Ice. I woke up with “Ice, Ice Baby” stuck in my head. Now, I totally realize that Vanilla Ice is a kinda skeezy, dumb guy. But “Ice, Ice Baby” is still one of my favorite songs after all these years and I believe that it stands the test of time. Especially since it is sampled from another successful song.

If you want to see a funny take on a very Vanilla Ice-style character, head on over to CW.com to watch webisodes of Stupid Hype, starring Wilson Bethel from Hart of Dixie (he of shirtless Wade fame). I am Wilson’s friend on Facebook. His actual friend. Mostly because no one apparently told him to make a separate Fan Page for his fans.

Wilson Bethel as Wade on Hart of Dixie
Photo: The CW

For a short taste, check out the official music video here:

What would be my second song I would karaoke if I was brave enough? Why, “Picture” by Kid Rock and Sheryl Crow. Who would I duet with, you ask? Isn’t the answer obvious? Myself:)

Being a Kid Rock AND Sheryl Crow fan, I can easily mimic either while singing along to my car radio. (Note: I never said that I did it well!)

But, alas, my gifted performances will never touch the world, because I am not brave enough (and I generally don’t drink) to perform in front of other people.

If I had my own karaoke machine in the privacy of my own home? THAT might be fun!

Yup, yup.  Word to your mother!

[What does that even MEAN?!]

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