Tag Archives: song

Wienermobile

This post will make you laugh, and it will make you cry.

My deep feelings about the Wienermobile are plenty. Let me share them with you now.

I never knew such a thing as the Oscar Mayer Wienermobile existed, until one night on the 11 o’clock news I saw it as the final 30 second special interest feature they always do before cutting away to the Tonight Show. As a devoted follower of all things weird and pop culture, I instantly fell in love.

I sent away to Oscar Mayer for an information pack about the Wienermobile. In those pre-Internet days, that is just how we did things. The packet was a folder full of stuff, containing an 8×10 glossy of the Wienermobile, along with historical facts, and of course a catalog of fine Oscar Mayer products for purchase.

First Wienermobile info packet from Oscar Mayer

First Wienermobile info packet from Oscar Mayer

Being a good little consumer, I totally ordered a Wienermobile shirt (it was one of my favorites for years), a Wienermobile Hot Wheel, and several wiener whistles, that I then continued to hand out to people who were important to me for years to come. (If you knew me in person, you would understand. Or at least you would smile to my face and laugh behind my back about it. That IS the polite thing to do, afterall*.)

Wiener Whistle

Wiener Whistle

I was instantly interested in how I could maybe one day get to drive the Wienermobile.  Unfortunately, it was a college internship thing.  At this time, I was only senior in high school.  So, I hung the picture on my bedroom wall and wore my shirt weekly.  (Can you guess that I was not popular in high school?  I was Sue Heck, from The Middle.  I was so oblivious, I didn’t even realize how unpopular I was.  Except I had glasses instead of braces.)  At this time, I may have also came up with my dream of Jennifer’s Wiener Hut.

Sue Heck from The Middle standing in front of a giant hot dog.  It is like this picture was MADE for this post!

Sue Heck from The Middle standing in front of a giant hot dog. It is like this picture was MADE for this post!

When I started college and majored in Communications, taking classes in Radio and TV Broadcasting, and minored in English-Writing, I thought that maybe those would be skills Oscar Mayer might find useful.  I thought that maybe if I had a Wienermobile internship for a summer, that then I could parlay that into an actual job at Oscar Mayer.  Wisconsin is not that different from Michigan.  Weather or culturally.  I could probably handle living there.  I like cows and cheese.

When I was a junior in college, I inquired again in writing to Oscar Mayer about how to become a hotdogger (what they call the people who drive the dog). They sent me another information packet (not quite as awesome as the one from 3 years before).  Incidentally, that was the 60th anniversary of the Wienermobile.  They informed me that the internship was only for graduating seniors.  So, I would still have to wait.

Second Wienermobile info packet from Oscar Mayer

Second Wienermobile info packet from Oscar Mayer (Yes, I DO save everything)

With either the first or second mailing, they had sent me a cassette tape with all the different versions of the Oscar Mayer weiner song on it.  Traditional, march, bossa nova, you name it, it was on there.  I even used the music (and some of my other memorabilia) to make a commercial for my TV Production class.

[My apologies to the college students who are displayed within. I am withholding their names to avoid any further embarrassment.]

The Wienermobile came to Toledo.  I was brave and drove down all by myself to go see it at the Lucas County Fairgrounds.  I took many pictures.  They wouldn’t let anyone go inside of it 😦

The Oscar Mayer Wienermobile at Ned Skeldon Stadium

The Oscar Mayer Wienermobile at Ned Skeldon Stadium

As I got closer to graduation, I wandered into the Career Center at the college once or twice.  It was useless.  Usually no one offered any help in there.  Once the adviser guy did talk to me, and admitted that they did not get many job postings for positions in the Communications area.  (Gee, thanks.  Glad I spent 4 years worth of money here so that you could tell me that now!)

On one of these trips in, I saw it…

The sign to apply for the Wienermobile Hotdogger interships that year!  The year of my impending graduation!

The bulletin that Adrian College posted (Note the incorrect spelling of Mayer!)

The bulletin that Adrian College posted (Note the incorrect spelling of Mayer!)

But F**K!  The deadline was just a few days away!

I had to type up a resume and cover letter and get it in the mail, pronto.  I am sure whatever I had for a resume at the time was pathetic, so I am sure I had to spend some time in the computer lab to revise it.  The computer lab that was always busy, because many students did not yet have their own desktop computers.  (Laptop?  What is a laptop?  A cell phone?  Only guys on Wall Street have those.  A smart phone?  Does not compute.)  I went to the post office and mailed it off priority 2-day mail, which I had never used before, because I wanted it to make it there by the deadline.

Then I worried and fretted that I had not made the deadline.  I never heard back from them.  Not even a rejection letter.  By the time summer came and they would have been starting their Wieneriffic journey, I knew I was not worthy of the wiener 😦  I would have missed my then boyfriend, now husband if they had chosen me.  But I think he would have understood.  And followed me to Wisconsin.

For years, I was bitter about not getting the internship.  I still am.  In July of 2011, I was laid off from my job of 12 years.  A year and a half later, I was still looking for a new job.  I had gotten pretty desperate by then, so I was applying to somewhat crazy jobs anyway.  Then I stumbled across the Hotdogger job.  Again!  But this time, it was not tied to anything about college.  There were no restrictions, so I applied again!

I knew I wouldn’t get it.  And I knew it was crazy, since I had a husband and small child at home who I really couldn’t leave to travel.  But I had to apply.  Again.

So I could feel rejected.  Again.

I always knew someday I would write a blog post about the Wienermobile.

But what spurred me to do it now?

THIS!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wydIrFT570E

It is for only 8 hours, and there are other restrictions (click here for more info).

I HAVE ANOTHER SHOT!  And because I am a powerful manifester, I will continue to get shots until IT IS MINE!

You think my confidence is cocky?  I have a $2000 6 foot tall plush giraffe that I got for free in my house to prove that I CAN make my dreams come true.  That only took me 20 years.  And it only took me 20 years to get a dog.  Hmmm…and to get a Red Wings hockey jersey…

I see a pattern here.

This bodes well for me and the wiener.  And for getting a book published sometime soon.

NEVER GIVE UP ON YOUR DREAMS!

RELISH THEM! (hehehehehe)

Once again I am coming down to the wire, though.  If you want to enter as well, just tweet #tweet2lease by 2/7/14.  But please don’t, because I want to win.

But if you do, and you do win, please swing by my house for a ride.  That is all I really want…to have a ride in the Oscar Mayer Wienermobile.

…and the Goodyear Blimp.  Obviously not at the same time though.

* “afterall” is one word in the funnygurl2 dictionary.

New Mix CD: What The Hell?!

Having a long commute to work again, it takes no time at all for me to compile a list of songs that I try to search the radio dial for, and them am disappointed when I can’t find them.

Then I give up and make a mix CD of them all. I don’t have a car radio with an mp3 input hole or iPod that has a screen/playlists. So, I must burn CDs, like some sort of primitive late 90’s animal.

I think I am going through a mid-life crisis. And Avril Lavigne has a new album coming out. This CD reflects all that.

Warning for sensitive eyes: I buy and quote the explicit versions of all the songs.  And all the best parts are the ones with the swear words.

I have included the iTunes genres so you can see how schizophrenic my musical tastes are. And so that you may laugh at Apple’s classifications.

And that is why they call it a MIX TAPE Photo: gokwala.com

And that is why they call it a MIX TAPE
Photo: gokwala.com

1. Counting Stars-One Republic POP
This is one of those songs that I never noticed until I found myself singing along to it on the radio one day. It rocks, but there is a sound effect in the background that sounds just like my Pointer whining. That bothers me a little.
“Lately I been, I been losing sleep
Dreaming about the things that we could be
But baby, I been, I been prayin’ hard
Said no more counting dollars
We’ll be counting stars
Yeah, we’ll be counting stars”*

2. Over My Head (Cable Car)-The Fray ROCK
I have loved this song since it came out. My favorite part:
“Everyone knows I’m in
Over my head
Over my head
With eight seconds left in overtime
She’s on your mind
She’s on your mind”

3. Over My Head-Richard Marx POP
The local radio station that will play ANYTHING plays this all the time, even though it is from 2012. I bought it because I liked it, I thought it would be funny to put next to The Fray song of the same name, and I feel a little sorry for Richard Marx. Although he probably has more money than I ever will have, so he is probably doing just fine. My crazy friend and my green-haired friend and her brother all went to see Richard Marx once at an outdoor venue in the summer. On the big screen that was broadcasting his performance, I watched a bug fly in his mouth mid-song. He never missed a beat or hit a wrong note. He didn’t spit until the song was over. It really impressed me. He is a class act.


4. The a Team-Ed Sheeran SINGER/SONGWRITER

This is has terribly depressing subject matter, but it is catchy and gets stuck in my head.
“It’s too cold outside
For angels to fly”

5. Speak Life-tobyMac CHRISTIAN
I don’t know why I like tobyMac, I just do. This song is very upbeat and dancey, just like “Steal My Show”, the only other song by him that I know.
“So speak Life, speak Life.
To the deadest darkest night.
Speak life, speak Life.
When the sun won’t shine and you don’t know why.”

6. We Can’t Stop-Miley Cyrus POP
I have liked Miley since her Hannah Montana days. I think her recent stunts that have attracted publicity are doing just what they were designed to do: ATTRACT PUBLICITY! I think she is a really good singer, although this song doesn’t fully showcase that. Who knew something so cool would come from the guy who cursed us with “Achy Breaky Heart”.
“It’s our party we can do what we want to
It’s our house we can love who we want to
It’s our song we can sing if we want to
It’s my mouth I can say what I want to”

7. Wrecking Ball-Eli Lieb POP
I like Miley’s version, but this guy really rocks it.
“Don’t you ever say I just walked away
I will always want you”

8. Girls Just Want to Have Fun-Cyndi Lauper POP
I heard this song on the way to work this week and it actually made me cry. I am going to blame it on the onset of Seasonal Affective Disorder. But some of the lyrics really are deep.
“Some boys take a beautiful girl
And hide her away from the rest of the world
I want to be the one to walk in the sun
Oh girls they want to have fun”

Jared Leto of 30 Seconds to Mars

Jared Leto of 30 Seconds to Mars

9. Up In The Air-30 Seconds to Mars ALTERNATIVE
I have liked 30 Seconds to Mars since they came out with their first song “Capricorn”. I love that Jared Leto is proving that former actors can have successful bands. I love it when he wears eyeliner. I can’t believe I missed going to see them in my concert-going 20’s.
“I’ll wrap my hands around your neck so tight with love, love.
A thousand times I tempted fate.
A thousand times I played this game.
A thousand times that I have said today, today, today.”

10. City of Angels-30 Seconds to Mars ALTERNATIVE
Every time this song comes on the radio, I change it, because the beginning is just so slow. But I love the emotion in the song. The lyrics say “strangers”, but Jared actually sings it like “strangels”. I want to be a strangel for Halloween. Sort of like a strange angel? I could just wear my normal clothes and mismatched socks, and slap on a pair of wings. I have black wings. That would make me more stranger.
“Lost in the city of angels
Down in the comfort of strangers
I found myself in the fire burnt hills
In the land of a billion lights”

11. What the Hell-Avril Lavigne POP
The namesake for this whole CD. I totally love Avril, and I have all her albums. Well, I did, except somehow I missed when “Goodbye Lullabye” came out. I am guessing that was because I was busy with my son’s doctor appointments and trying to find a job. I wasn’t listening to much radio. But my collection is now up-to-date. I would BE Avril if I could.
“All my life I’ve been good but now
I’m thinking ‘What the hell?'”

12. Smile-Avril Lavigne POP
It has a cute music video.

13. Rock N Roll-Avril Lavigne POP
It has a cute music video with Bear-Sharks. And the song rocks!
“I don’t care if I’m a misfit
I like it better than the hipster bullshit
I am the motherfucking princess
You still love me”

14. Undead-Hollywood Undead ROCK
I love Rap/Rock and I was very sad when it went out of style. Kid Rock, Limp Bizkit, Linkin Park–I loved them all. I am happy that Hollywood Undead seems to be bringing it back.
“You better get up out the way,
Tomorrow we’ll rise so let’s fight today,
You know, I don’t give a fuck what you think or say,
‘Cause we’ll rock this whole place anyway.”

15. Dead Bite-Hollywood Undead ROCK
Rap/Rock, and REALLY creepy.
“What would you do if I told you I hate you?
What would you do if your life’s on the line?
What would you say if I told you I hate you?
I’ve got something that’ll blow your mind, mind”

16. 4 Real-Avril Lavigne POP
I needed more songs on the CD.

17. Darlin-Avril Lavigne POP
Ditto

18. Goodbye-Avril Lavigne POP
A very powerful song, but kinda slow for my taste.

*All lyrics belong to their respective writers. I am sorry to say I am not that talented.

If I Had The Guts To Karaoke, I Would Sing. . .

Ice, Ice Baby by Vanilla Ice

While to the world I just look like a little geeky white chick with glasses, I am secretly an awesome rapper. Well, for that one song anyway. And a song called the “Punky Power Rap” I invented in the 6th grade. But no one should ever really hear that song beyond my asbestos friend and my husband. And even they just smile and nod.

How did I get so good at singing “Ice, Ice Baby” around my house? Because I have been practicing for 20 years, that’s why. Several years ago I even bought the music-only karaoke track off iTunes so I could practice in my car. The problem with that is that I didn’t have a copy of the correct lyrics in front of me at all times. I am pretty sure that over 20 years I have mutated some of the lyrics from their original form.

The other night I dreamed that I was writing rap songs with Vanilla Ice. I woke up with “Ice, Ice Baby” stuck in my head. Now, I totally realize that Vanilla Ice is a kinda skeezy, dumb guy. But “Ice, Ice Baby” is still one of my favorite songs after all these years and I believe that it stands the test of time. Especially since it is sampled from another successful song.

If you want to see a funny take on a very Vanilla Ice-style character, head on over to CW.com to watch webisodes of Stupid Hype, starring Wilson Bethel from Hart of Dixie (he of shirtless Wade fame). I am Wilson’s friend on Facebook. His actual friend. Mostly because no one apparently told him to make a separate Fan Page for his fans.

Wilson Bethel as Wade on Hart of Dixie
Photo: The CW

For a short taste, check out the official music video here:

What would be my second song I would karaoke if I was brave enough? Why, “Picture” by Kid Rock and Sheryl Crow. Who would I duet with, you ask? Isn’t the answer obvious? Myself:)

Being a Kid Rock AND Sheryl Crow fan, I can easily mimic either while singing along to my car radio. (Note: I never said that I did it well!)

But, alas, my gifted performances will never touch the world, because I am not brave enough (and I generally don’t drink) to perform in front of other people.

If I had my own karaoke machine in the privacy of my own home? THAT might be fun!

Yup, yup.  Word to your mother!

[What does that even MEAN?!]

MUTILATION!

Now, to fully appreciate the jingle I wrote below, you need to be familiar with the 1980’s commercial for the Milton Bradley/Hasbro board game Operation* that inspired my parody.

When you read the words below, be sure to sing them to the musical score in the commercial.

Enjoy!

MUTILATION!

You’re the doctor, got the patient on the run

MUTILATION!

Oh joy, won’t this be fun!

MUTILATION!

Cut off all the fingers but ya better leave the thumbs

MUTILATION!

The patient doesn’t necessarily have to be numb

MUTILATION!

You’ll lose your lunch, heave-up every crumb

MUTILATION!

If you check into this hospital, you are pretty dumb

MUTILATION!

(See what happens to idle minds of high school students when left unattended in a computer lab?)

* I am in no way affiliated with Milton Bradley or Hasbro. or any actual hospital or medical school.

Rocky Mountain Christmas

To most, John Denver is a joke.

To me, he is the sound of Christmas.

When I was a kid, my mom had the record (large, round, vinyl black thing with grooves) Rocky Mountain Christmas by John Denver.  She played it every year at holiday time.  Christmas starts for me with the first few tinkling notes of Aspenglow.

Rocky Mountain Christmas by John Denver on CD & record, and John Denver: Christmas in Concert on CD

I would be happy if it was the only Christmas album I ever owned or played.

My mom didn’t own any other John Denver records.  My crazy friend knew that I liked this Christmas album, so then on mix tapes she would put other non-Christmas John Denver songs.  She didn’t understand.  It wasn’t so much that I liked John Denver, it was that I liked his voice with this collection of Christmas songs from this period of time.  From my childhood.

John Denver sings nice, straight-forward renditions of the classics: The Christmas Song, Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, the seldom-heard Silver Bells, Away in a Manger, What Child Is This, Oh Holy Night (a spectacular version), and Silent Night.  There is no Mariah Carey warbling.

The original songs on the album are some of my favorites.  I already mentioned Aspenglow.   Christmas for Cowboys paints a wonderful musical picture of a lonely holiday on the snow-covered plains.  My husband likes Please Daddy (Don’t Get Drunk This Christmas).  A Baby Just Like You is my favorite.  John Denver wrote it for his own son Zachary. I love to belt out “MERRY CHRISTMAS LITTLE ZACHARY!” at the top of my lungs.

I know, I’m weird.

Sometimes now I change it to be my sons’ name.

Inside cover of Rocky Mountain Christmas, featuring the lyrics to A Baby Just Like You (I used to love to look at the details of this picture when I was a kid)

Several years ago my mom bought the album on CD, so it was very nice to be able to listen to it again.  The problem was, we had only one copy that we shared.  (I have no idea why I never thought about burning a second copy.  Oh ya, because that would be illegal.;)

Last year I found my own copy of Rocky Mountain Christmas on CD.  I even found a concert version of the same songs.  My mom is very happy I am no longer hogging her CD.

I still don’t understand why none of the Christmas music radio stations play anything off this album.  They play other seldom-played artists.  They always need different artists singing the same 12 traditional songs.  And it would make me so happy.

A Christmas Together: John Denver & The Muppets – Also a nice album, but just not the same for me

I kept my mom’s record of Rocky Mountain Christmas all these years, even though there was no way to play it.

Last year, my husband and I picked up a Fisher Price children’s record player from the 80’s at a garage sale and a handful of records.

So, while I totally enjoy digital clarity, the ability to listen to it in my car, and load it on my iPod, I am playing the original record for my son as I write this.  Sure, it is scratchy from 37 years of use and improper storage and probably a pretty dull needle.  But it takes me right back to being a preschooler myself in my living room in our house in Riga, Michigan.  In the terrible 70’s clothes that my mom dressed me in.


When you listen to the CD, you don’t have to see his dorky appearance.