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What I Learned This Week – 5/4/14

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I am not a positive person by nature.  But I am trying.

Hard.  It is sooo very hard.  But this week I learned that I am improving.

My husband had been working overtime for months, which recently ended.  I reduced my days per week at work due to the fact that I thought all the babysitting was killing my elderly mother.  Plus, my husband bought a new (used) car last month.

The sudden reduction in income and increase in expenses has led us to what I used to refer to as “living poor” (i.e. lots of spaghetti and boxes of macaroni and cheese for dinner).  We can pay all our bills, but that leaves very little money left for groceries for a family of three, plus dog food for two large dogs.

But, instead, I found myself referring to it as “living within our means”.  Instead of using our credit card to buy extra food and gasoline, we will just have to live on the cash we have.  That isn’t necessarily super positive, but it definitely doesn’t have as negative a connotation as “living poor”.

The Secret by Rhonda Byrne

The Secret by Rhonda Byrne

The book “The Secret” talks about telling the universe what you want and not to tell it what you want to avoid.  For instance, I would thank the universe for my red Jeep Wrangler.  I do not actually have a Jeep Wrangler.  Yet.  But the universe does not know that.  And by putting my energy into being thankful for it, I may just manifest one.*

This week I also realized I need to eat less food.  Which works out well with being able to buy less food, I guess.  But that still doesn’t stop me from being hungry and wanting to eat.  My asbestos friend used a phrase that I thought was very apt.  She said she needed to “reign in” her eating.  She didn’t call it a diet or trying to lose weight.  It wasn’t implied that she would suffer or lack anything.  She was just going to have less.  Plus, it has a royal ring to it.  “Reign it in”.

So, my two new mottos to live by this week are “live within my means” and “reign it in”.

Hmmm.  While they do not seem negative, why am I still left with the nagging feeling of being hungry and poor?

Hershey's chocolate syrup

Hershey’s chocolate syrup

I miss my daily chocolate already.  Time to lick some Hershey’s syrup off a spoon.

*  At work yesterday I was thinking a lot about how I am more productive when I work by myself, and also how an extra $25 would come in handy.  One of my co-workers pulled a no-show, and I had to stay later to cover her. :-/  Be careful what you wish for.

Pharmacy Giraffe

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The Pharmacy Giraffe. I call him Giraffey.

When I was growing up, I lived within walking distance of a pharmacy. I would go there to buy candy. I would go there to buy poster board for school projects. I would go there to buy my mom Christmas stocking stuffers. I would go there for something to do. When I was a little older, I went there with my asbestos friend to look at the teen magazines, which once in a while we actually purchased. You would think they would have been grateful for my business. No. Instead they watched me like a hawk every time I was in the store, apparently expecting me to steal something.

[NOTE: Now, I know you are thinking, “A whole blog post about a stuffed giraffe? Really?” But if you hang in until the end, it has sort of a nice ending.]

The pharmacy had one corner of the store with gifty items. Figurines. Stuffed animals. And the largest stuffed giraffe I had ever seen in my life. I used to hug his neck every time I went in. I dreamed of taking him home with me. He was for sale, but I think his purpose in the store was more to draw the children over to that area. Which he did very well. I remember the price tag on him being $500. Someone else told me $2000. Either way, no one ever bought him.

I grew up and moved away. The pharmacy was bought by new owners and moved to a new location. I remember going in to the new pharmacy once and thinking how sterile, bare it looked. And I was sad to find there was no giraffe there.
A number of years later, after my asbestos friend had left town and moved back, she convinced me to ride on a Noah’s Ark-themed float for her church for the town festival [She is always tricking me into doing things like that. She is a bad influence.]. Anyway, I met her pastor, who was dressed up like Noah. And looked about nineteen. And his wife, who looked more like Mary looking for a manger than Noah’s wife [She was pregnant at the time].

As you may have guessed, they had animals on the float. Wood-cut outs, along with stuffed animals. The best one, if you asked me, was the stuffed giraffe. I told my asbestos friend that it reminded me of the giraffe from the pharmacy. She replied that it was the very same one. It made the eight year old in me a little excited. It rained that day and he got a little wet, but it didn’t seem to cause him too much damage.

Three years later, I was pregnant with my son. I saw a stuffed giraffe at work. I decided right then and there that my child’s room would not be complete without one. I hoped to get it for free or discounted through work, as that was a big benefit of working there. But I didn’t really want to spend the money. The giraffe work was selling was also way smaller than the one I was used to from my childhood.

When I mentioned this to my asbestos friend, as I do with all my obsessions, she told me that the pharmacy giraffe that had rode on the church float was still sitting in the church basement. It had flooded down there and he had gotten a little wet, but it didn’t seem to cause him too much damage. After a quick call, she confirmed that the previous owner no longer wanted it. But, the previous owner said it was CURSED!

From what I remember, as the story goes, the previous owner bought the giraffe at auction when the pharmacy closed for her mother. But apparently the mother said it was too big and didn’t want it. The previous owner had tried to get rid of the giraffe several times. But, apparently, every time someone tried to take him out of the Blissfield village limits, they would experience car trouble, or some other kind of incident.

I took my chances with the curse and hauled him home. Not a single terrible fate befell me. That tells me it was fate. I was destined to own him.

Once I got him home, that was not the end of the story. Do you remember how I said I used to always go in to the pharmacy and hug his neck? Well, I was not the only one. And it appeared that most people chose to rub his nose, because there was not much left of it. It was time for another one of my unusual sewing projects (ex. Werecart). I spent a Sunday very carefully reconstructing his nose, knowing that if I screwed it up I would be destroying a cherished part of Blissfield history of my generation. Even with all that pressure, it came out quite good.

Before


After


I truly believe the Law of Attraction is how the giraffe came into my possession. I wanted him so badly back then and truly believed he should be mine that it became reality. I can no longer ever deny The Secret of the Law of Attraction. Of course, once I put a bed and a crib and shelf and a dresser in my son’s room, it because clear that there was no room for a giraffe as well. So, he happily hangs out in my dining room for now. And maybe the old ladies at the pharmacy knew something I didn’t. I do have something from that store that I didn’t pay for after all:)

The End


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My Fears-Part 2

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(In case you missed it, here is the link to My Fears-Part 1 https://imnotstalkingyou.com/2012/03/27/my-fears-part-1)

When I moved into my current house, I discovered my extreme fear of bats. My house is over 100 years old. As the bat removal guy said, my house looks very nice from the curb. But when you look closely, there were all sorts of nooks and crannies for those filthy vermin to live in. We had multiple bat appearances. The final straw was when two bats were in my house during the first week my husband moved to third shift, hence not home to rid the house of them for me. So, we called the bat removal guy. It cost a fortune, but the barriers have held, except for one time we had an unwelcome visitor. The bat guy came back and patched up the spot that birds had pecked open. I find my piece of mind totally worth the money we spent. But I was too cheap to have the bat shit cleaned out of my walls. Extra insulation, right?

My other big fear is one probably very common to people across the country at this moment. I have a fear of not being financially secure. My family was in a better place than most when my husband and I started losing our jobs last year. (Of course, we are in a state that has been in a recession longer than the rest of the country. Which sucks.) Our credit cards and cars were paid off and we had some savings. But my son’s medical bills have eaten away at our savings. We should still be OK for the near future, but one major medical procedure and it could all be gone. And I find myself unable to get a job at the moment, because I need to be able to have open availability to take my son to specialist appointments and spend the night with him in the hospital if necessary. We don’t really need any financial/government assistance (other than unemployment) yet, but I believe it could be coming soon.

So, I try not to live my life in fear anymore. A few years ago, two friends of mine tried to open me up to the law of attraction, or the power of positive thinking. I was very resistant. But I gradually found it was easier to get out of bed and leave the house every day if I expected good things instead of bad. I tried to read the book “The Secret”, but it was very repetitious. I did better with “The Secret” desk calendar, which broke the book into small paragraph tidbits of information.

It is in this mindset that I decided to get pregnant with my son. If I had expected the worst, I could not have brought him into this world. This mindset is what helps me deal with his kidney issue that we are still waiting to hear if it has been completely resolved.

I’m not stalking you. is NOW ON FACEBOOK! “Like” that I’m not stalking you and get an update when there is a new post to read. (It is sort of like YOU are stalking ME.)

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