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My Fears-Part 2

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(In case you missed it, here is the link to My Fears-Part 1

When I moved into my current house, I discovered my extreme fear of bats. My house is over 100 years old. As the bat removal guy said, my house looks very nice from the curb. But when you look closely, there were all sorts of nooks and crannies for those filthy vermin to live in. We had multiple bat appearances. The final straw was when two bats were in my house during the first week my husband moved to third shift, hence not home to rid the house of them for me. So, we called the bat removal guy. It cost a fortune, but the barriers have held, except for one time we had an unwelcome visitor. The bat guy came back and patched up the spot that birds had pecked open. I find my piece of mind totally worth the money we spent. But I was too cheap to have the bat shit cleaned out of my walls. Extra insulation, right?

My other big fear is one probably very common to people across the country at this moment. I have a fear of not being financially secure. My family was in a better place than most when my husband and I started losing our jobs last year. (Of course, we are in a state that has been in a recession longer than the rest of the country. Which sucks.) Our credit cards and cars were paid off and we had some savings. But my son’s medical bills have eaten away at our savings. We should still be OK for the near future, but one major medical procedure and it could all be gone. And I find myself unable to get a job at the moment, because I need to be able to have open availability to take my son to specialist appointments and spend the night with him in the hospital if necessary. We don’t really need any financial/government assistance (other than unemployment) yet, but I believe it could be coming soon.

So, I try not to live my life in fear anymore. A few years ago, two friends of mine tried to open me up to the law of attraction, or the power of positive thinking. I was very resistant. But I gradually found it was easier to get out of bed and leave the house every day if I expected good things instead of bad. I tried to read the book “The Secret”, but it was very repetitious. I did better with “The Secret” desk calendar, which broke the book into small paragraph tidbits of information.

It is in this mindset that I decided to get pregnant with my son. If I had expected the worst, I could not have brought him into this world. This mindset is what helps me deal with his kidney issue that we are still waiting to hear if it has been completely resolved.

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3 responses

  1. Pingback: My Fears-Part 1 « I'm not stalking you.

  2. I felt the same way about The Secret. I liked the message, but the bike bored me. Check out “loving what is” by Byron Katie. It will blow your mind, change your perspective, and ultimately your life! 🙂

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