Tag Archives: Borders

What I Learned This Week – 6/17/12

Posted on June 17, 2012 by funnygurl2


This week I learned that seeing my old co-workers feels like we all fought a war together. I am pretty sure most co-workers that get together don’t feel that way. But in a lot of ways, working for the company I used to work for felt like fighting battles. It was one thing after another, which I guess is always how it is in business. But somehow our company was always the underdog. One year at Christmas time, we even had a general leaving company-wide voicemails telling us that if we didn’t make the plan numbers for the year, our company would be history. Little did he know, we limped along for another year (without him).

Seeing each other again, we all seemed happy (although some sad circumstances surrounded our reunion). I don’t remember anyone looking happy the last year my former employer was in business. So, I guess the more correct statement would be “we all fought a losing war together.” Instead of comparing battle scars, we compared what companies we have sent our resumes to, interviewed at, and what we have done to keep or lose our house. It was kind of like a giant unemployment support group.


I also learned this week that I need to start a driving school. Drivers are horrible! I do not seem to be the only one who is noticing this. The laws of the road are one thing that I already know. And I feel like they are going to waste, as no one else is following them. The only thing I would need to start this business is buy a car and fit it with one of those Driver’s Ed extra brake devices. Which, I don’t have the money to do. But it I did, the car would be mostly tax deductible, as it would be for my business.

Normally I am scared of teenagers. But there is one area where they are vulnerable—their quest for a driver’s license. After all, a license if a privilege, not a right. If I owned a driving school, I would have ultimate power over them! (Insert Evil Laugh here.)

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GCB

Posted on May 4, 2012 by funnygurl2

When I worked for the second biggest book store chain in the country (now defunct), I used to allocate regional books. There was one book that was very popular in Texas. So popular, that for a while I couldn’t get more stock, not even from distributors. I always remembered the name of that book—Good Christian Bitches.

The Book


That was the hardcover version. When they released Good Christian Bitches in paperback, it went to the national buyer and I didn’t get to buy it anymore. I was interested when I heard that ABC was going to turn it into a TV show. After all, I was responsible for a tiny part of it’s success. I was most interested to know what they would call it. I think GCB was a bad choice, and probably hurts it’s viewership. People who haven’t heard of the book and old people like my mom have no idea what GCB stand for, not that my mom would watch it anyway.

The GCB is a lot like Suburgatory. But that might not be a good comparison, since Suburgatory is also a new show that not everyone might know. Both shows take everyday things you take for granted and turn them upside down. But Suburgatory is quirkier. Maybe a better description of GCB is that it has the humor, wealth, and weekly society events of The O.C. But it is smarter. The series shows how people who know a lot about the church and scripture can twist it for their own uses. You don’t need to know a lot about religion to enjoy the show. I sure don’t.

Amanda and the Pastor


The show centers around Amanda’s return to Dallas after her husband’s scandalous death. Amanda and her two teenagers move in with her mother Gigi, played by the wonderful Annie Potts channeling Dixie Carter. Amanda was a mega-popular bitch in high school. She claims she no longer is. But it sneaks out every now and again. Every week Amanda butts heads and works together with the girls she terrorized in high school: Carlene, Cricket, Sharon, and Heather. But I don’t understand how anyone could ever terrorize Kristin Chenoweth. She is such a spitfire. I think she is much better utilized in the part of Carlene than she was on Glee. There are other sudsy soap opera elements, such as Cricket’s husband being gay and Amanda dating Carlene’s brother. But the Pastor seems to be purposefully single. I think he and Amanda could get together sometime in the future.

Cricket, Carlene(Kristen Chenoweth), Sharon


I would love to read the book and compare it to the TV show, except there are no bookstores in town. And I am a person who enjoys television much more than reading a book. Does that make me visual? Or more couch potato?

Gigi (Annie Potts) with her grandchildren


I read in my Entertainment Weekly that GCB is on the bubble and could get cancelled. That is a shame, because it is a smart, funny show. I laughed out loud when Carlene (dressed in angel wings, playing the Holy Spirit in the church musical) swung wildly on a flight harness and broke the church’s stained glass window. There are very few shows that will make me laugh out loud. There are also very few shows that I would consider buying on DVD. This is one of them. Especially if I can’t watch it on TV anymore.

I believe ABC did a disservice to this show by overplaying only one promo for the series featuring a teenage girl’s cheerleader uniform popping open to expose her breasts. The show is more than that. I don’t feel like they have showcased Annie Potts or Kristin Chenoweth enough in commercials that would drive viewership.

I urge you to catch up on past episodes at ABC.com and start watching it at 10PM Sunday Nights on ABC. I will warn you, there are a lot of blond women on the show. But with a variety of figures and personalities, you will be able to tell them apart in no time.

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So Long, Borders

Posted on September 19, 2011 by funnygurl2

I didn’t think I would need to write a farewell to my former employer, Borders Group Inc. But I somehow feel compelled to.

I was never much of a Borders shopper, having only been in one store once before I was hired at the Corporate Office in 1999. And it if hadn’t been for a college field trip gone awry, I wouldn’t have ever heard of Borders at all. (Ya, that is one of my pet peeves throughout the years. Borders just assumed everyone had heard of them. If you didn’t have a Borders store in your town, then you really never knew they existed. Seriously.) I only became a Borders shopper because I got an employee discount, which made me buy a ton of books I have never read because, wait for it, I AM NOT A READER. If I find a series (hello, Fearless & Twilight) or a single book that I really like, I will read it. But I grew up on television, and that is really my chosen medium of entertainment.

So, that finds this post as mostly a farewell to the Borders Corporate Office (and yes, I still call it that–screw you Store Support Center:P). I liked that it was a place where you could come in as late as you wanted, as long as you were there by 9am, and leave as early as you wanted, as long as it was after 4pm. I loved that they let people with unnatural hair colors wander the hallways as if they were no different at all. I liked that we had diversity activities where we made necklaces & bracelets of all different colored beads. One year we made mosaic drink coasters. I still have mine. I will hold on to them as souvenirs of my time at Borders. It is very sad that no company now has the extra time or money for such morale-boosting employee participation events.

I will miss the musical performers who used to stop by. In better times, we would have many of these a year, and most of them open to the full company. I met Jason Mraz twice. I saw Joss Stone perform. Met Ricky Scaggs and Rosanne Cash. I saw Cheap Trick perform in the cafeteria (not a very glamorous locale). I was in the lunch line in the cafeteria behind Phantom Planet…about 2 years before their song was probably used as the theme for one of my favorite TV shows, The O.C. I got to meet (& hug) NEW KID ON THE BLOCK Joey McIntyre! I saw Loretta Lynn getting off her tour bus and walking inside in her pink ruffled dress. I saw Robin Thicke perform–which as I figure it, gets me three degrees away from Matthew Perry! (Swoon) I walked past the conference room where Kevin Bacon was performing with The Bacon Brothers (would that get me one degree from Kevin Bacon?)

It was more than just musicians too. Suzy Orman came in & talked to us about one of her new books. I sat in the back of the room–she has a very bold, loud, scary personality! On one of my daily walks outside, I passed an old guy in a very expensive suit–only to realize it was Lee Iacocoa.

I worked at Borders when 9/11 happened. They came and said that we could go home if we felt uncomfortable staying. I went home just because I wanted a day off, but I got paid for it, which was really awesome. Borders lost a store at the World Trade Center site. It was store 142, I think in tower 12. Everyone got out, which is great. Borders turned a giant area of cubes at the corporate office into a giant conference room and named it conference room 142, in honor of the lost store. Too bad that should have been a sign to all of us that we had less employees every year if we could sacrifice that many cubicles for a conference room.

I do want to forget the girl in the cafeteria who always miscounted my change and thought I was a lesbian. And all the times I was reorganized into a new department or boss or position. And all the hours of my short little life sucked up by my terribly long commute. But I do not want to forget all the wonderful friends I made while I worked there. I hope to stay in touch with many of them as we find new wonderful, better-paying jobs (positive thinking people!).

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