Category Archives: A day in the life

My Life Rules – Part 1

No eating Taco Bell after 9pm. It has gastric consequences. Also, I might turn into a gremlin;)

Whoever drives the car should get to control the radio. Maybe my mom used that one on me as a teenager. I can’t remember.

No good deed goes unpunished.

I am on the path to my greatest good. That which is mine cannot be taken from me. From my asbestos friend, channeling Florence Scovel Shinn. Sort of like “you can’t lose what ain’t your’s.”

One I had in high school was something like “Remember you are always the ugliest person alive, ever.” As you may have guessed, that was the height of my self-esteem.

Don’t let the dogs into the backyard unleashed, without direct supervision. Sometimes you have to repeat a mistake a few times to learn from it. Like, a lot of times.

Never go to a gas station on a corner. I realize the gas station owners think it is a good idea to build them there, but it is just too hard to get in and out of them. There were only like two gas stations on my whole way to work that fit that rule.

Throw out leftovers on the fourth day. This rule has always served me well. As long as I can remember what day I made the food on:P

Am I starting to sound like that “Always Wear Sunscreen” song Baz Luhrmann put together? Well, you won’t hear me recommending that. I believe sunscreen actually causes skin cancer. Think about it. Putting chemicals on your highly porous skin just does not sound like a good idea to me. Maybe it is a secret plot by the medical community to drum up more business. I just heard on a very trustworthy, hard-hitting network news show (I think it was Sunday Morning with Charles Osgood) the other day that since people have started to wear more sunscreen, that the skin cancer rate has actually gone up. Coincidence?

Do not try to reinvent the boring grilled cheese sandwich by putting it on a metal fork and calling it a shish-ka-bob. Ouch.

Do not tell your friend that you burned yourself on a Pop-tart. She will not believe you. Even though it is totally true.

Don’t match your socks. When people ask why, say “why should they match?” This rule is only for me. It wouldn’t be special if everyone else did it:)

Book Review: “A Stolen Life” by Jaycee Lee Dugard

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Now that the Casey Anthony trial is essentially over, I have moved on to mildly obsessing over Jaycee Lee Dugard. You may or may not know that on July 12th she released a book called “A Stolen Life”, about the 18 years her kidnapper, rapist, and all-around-sicko kept her hidden in his ghetto backyard.

I don’t really remember when she went missing, because I was just a little older than her, and didn’t pay much attention to the news. I still find it so amazingly shockingly wonderful that she was found alive after so many years. And with the bonus of two healthy daughters. (Remember, no one picks their parents [in this case, father] by choice. Poor girls.) I remember when they were found, thinking, “My God. They have to get birth certificates & Social Security Numbers & get their teeth cleaned & get immunizations!!!” There are just so many things that they would be behind on. In an interview with Diane Sawyer, Jaycee mentioned how she had to learn to drive from her younger sister. If no one had dragged her into a car that fateful morning, she would have already been driving for years by now.

When they found her, I will admit I sent a small amount of money to an account that had been created for donations for her. Now she has created her own foundation called “The JAYC Foundation”. I’m still a little vague on it’s purpose, but you can order cute pinecone necklaces & keychains to support it. They are slightly too pricey for me though, as the stability of my job cracks a little more everyday.

The book sold out of bookstores & wholesalers almost immediately. Four days after it went on sale, Amazon was saying it would ship in “1 to 3 weeks.” I was afraid to read it, because I thought it would be too graphic & horrible. But I also wanted to get a copy before they were all gone, so I would have the choice to read it or not. Plus, I knew my mother was interested in reading it. The things that happened to her WERE HORRIBLE. But the book is written in her own easy-going, matter-of-fact voice. Her life was lonely & miserable & filled with terrible sexual acts, but she survived it. The stories in the book are very haunting though. I found myself during the day going “did I dream about that last night”, and I would realized that I had not had a dream, but read it in Jaycee’s book.

A big thing I took away from “A Stolen Life” was to follow your gut feelings. Some people would probably call this your “vibration.” Jaycee had a bad feeling that morning and thought about staying home from school. She should have. The universe was trying to tell her something. The campus police who took notice of Phillip Garrido & looked into his background were following their instincts that something was not right. More than just that he was crazy & hearing voices. We should always follow our gut instinct. If you stay home from work or school that day, you might never realize that something awful was waiting in your path.

I heard someone say the book is selling as fast as Oprah bookclub books used to. If Oprah was still doing her daily show, I’m sure she would want to be all over this one. I think I’m glad I read the book, because now I no longer had to wonder what Jaycee’s endless days of captivity were like. And although Jaycee went through these terrible things, she still has many of the normal emotions/reactions that we would all have. It is good to realize that we are all just human beings, trying to live on this planet together. Well, except Phillip & Nancy Garrido. They are real-world monsters.

Just Remember, It Could Always be Worse

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My son had surgery on 6/28. We were in the recovery room for six hours before the anesthesia wore off enough that he could go to a regular room. That sounds awful and scary, and it was. But while my son was in the recovery room, a four year old boy came in who was being treated for cancer. He had just spend a month at a clinic in Cleveland. He screamed in pain and kept begging the nurses that he just wanted to go home with his sister and be in his own pajamas in his own bed with his dog. It was heartbreaking. I couldn’t really feel bad about my baby, who had a surgery that went well and just needed more time to get other his anesthesia cocktail. I realized we were lucky, that someone else always has it worse.

I thought of that kid many times over the following week. When my son was losing blood and no one knew where it was going. When he had a 105 degree fever. When he needed a blood transfusion. When they told us he had a hematoma. When he ended up in the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit. When we were at the hospital for eleven days instead of two. I always, in the back of my head, thought he still has it better than that boy. There are probably parents who would call the cancer boy lucky, because he is still alive, while their children are not.

My son is home now & doing well. Sleeping in his own bed. I guess I will always wonder, sadly, if that little boy ever got to sleep in his own bed in his own pajamas, with his dog & his sister.

Verdict: Not Guilty

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1 First Degree Murder: Not Guilty
2 Aggravated Child Abuse: Not Guilty
3 Aggravated Manslaughter: Not Guilty
4-7 Providing False Information to Law Enforcement: Guilty

I think the case of the State of Florida vs. Casey Marie Anthony probably came out how it should have. I believe everything the prosecution presented was probably true, especially the motive. But in the end, they proved Caylee died by duct tape & was thrown in the swamp. But there was no finger prints, no DNA, no witnesses, that could connect Casey to this murder and absolutely no one else. The way our judicial system is set up, you can’t convict someone just because your gut says they did it. You need evidence to show it in some way.

I think Jose Baez did a very bad job as a lead defense attorney. But in the end, he did his job. He gave the jury reasonable doubt that Casey did not murder Caylee.

I do believe Casey will get her’s. Her family hates her. The whole state of Florida hates her. Much of the United States that followed the case hates her. Who would hire her for a job? Who would rent her an apartment? Some people say she could get a movie or book deal out of this. But I think she has created the wrong kind of celebrity. Afterall, no one wanted to touch OJ, even though he was found not guilty. She did henous things to her daughter. She is now a paraih.

R.I.P. Caylee Marie Anthony.

Parker

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Pathetic Parker at the Lenawee Humane Society


To continue from last week’s blog, here is how Dave got her name. I always wanted a “dog named Dave.” I think it may have come from Laverne & Shirley, because Shirley would talk about wanting to marry a doctor, have a boy & girl, a house with a white picket fence, and a dog named Dave. I also always knew I wanted a girl dog, because that is what I was used to. In high school, I decided someday I would have a dog named Dave D. Canine, because it sounds like a real name & then I could scam credit card companies into giving a dog a credit card. I never knew what the D stood for until we got her. She looked like a dingo (australian wild dog), so that is what the D came to stand for. We started calling her Daveweena. So her real full name is Daveweena Dingo Canine.

After we had Dave for a little over a year and gotten her reasonably trained, my husband was itching to get a dog of his own. Unlike myself, he made weekly trips to the Lenawee Humane Society before finding the dog that was right for him. He found a noisy, jumpy German Shorthair Pointer named Archer. Archer had been a stray, so the Humane Society had held him for a week. My husband spotted him the first day he was available for adoption. I infamously said,”You like THAT dog?” I stand by that statement to this day. We took Archer in the room to play with him. He was overly friendly, trying to sit in my lap the whole time. My husband was sure that was the dog for him, so we took him home. He was renamed Parker.

Parker on duty

Once home, Dave walked around plastered next to Parker’s side for a week, trying to dominate him & get him to play with her. He is not a very playful dog. We have hardwood floors, and Parker did not lay down on them for over a year. We took him camping. He refused to lay down. However, he was very fond of the couch. It is interesting how the couch was a doggy no-no zone until Parker came along. As we couldn’t keep him off of it, Dave was then allowed to lay on it as well. (The rule of the house is that animals have to move if humans want to sit on it, though. Dave is the guard dog of the house. I always say that Parker’s job is to hold down the couch, because gravity is very weak right there:) Parker only got a month of dog obedience training, whereas Dave got 16 months. It shows.

We learned that Parker is actually very cat-like. He can go lay on the bed & sleep for hours & you won’t even know he is there. But if it is dinner time, watch out. He will start begging & whining like 2 hours before feeding time. He also goes out to the bathroom more than any dog I have ever met. Part of that is due to the fact that he can drink an entire bowl of water at one time. But I really wish he wouldn’t. He is so whiny, that our best friends who used to dog sit for us, have said they will only continue to watch him if they can freely complain about him. Needless to say, he is going to be boarded on our next out-of-town adventure.

Parker is a giant flight risk. I can’t count the number of times he has runaway. He finds an open gate or he skinnies out between the fence & the house. I find it truly unbelievable that I have a nicely fenced backyard & I still have to tie my dogs up on leads, because otherwise they will escape. Once Dave broke her lead & jumped over the fence, all in the time it took me to take a wizz in the bathroom. Parker usually runs away in the middle of winter during an ice storm. But he once ran away on the first hot day of summer & was found after swimming in a lake. (Ew, stinky dog). Once, that we know of, he has crossed the busiest road near our house. Just the thought of that scares me. I think one time his running away could be partially blamed on my friend who threw a Pure Romance sex toy party at my house. She was making everyone sample lotions & perfumes with pheromones in them. Parker was shut in the other room, but making a God-awful wailing. Shortly after I think he escaped & went looking for love. His dog identification tag is the best investment we ever made. We now have him microchipped as well.

Oh, and as soon as we got Parker & he leaped into the back seat of the SUV with no problem, that is when Dave said,”Well, hell. If he can do that, so can I.” We never had to lift her up into the backseat of the car again.

Parker’s full name is Parker Jo Buhdoo. “Buhdoo” is a great word that I believe my friend invented. You want the definition of buhdoo? Look at Parker’s picture from the Humane Society.

Parker today