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The Worry Box

So, I found this app which has meditations that you can download. I have only tried two, one listen each, because I give up easily.

The second one I listened to was called “The Worry Box” by Monica A. Frank. It was all about visualizing a box to put your worries in. Your box could look like whatever you wanted. It should have a lock to keep the worries from escaping. She sl-ow-ly talked about how you would layer things in your box. She talked about different kinds of worries and what ones should go on the bottom and what ones should go on the top. I can’t remember the terminology, but it seemed like one of them were like “unreasonable worries” which were supposed to differ from worries you could action.

Um, if I knew the difference, I wouldn’t be downloading mental health apps, lady.

So, bear in mind, I was listening to this audio as I picked up dog poop in my back yard (luckily, from my own dog). And my mind was like, “Squirrel!

“I should go to Hobby Lobby (I recognize that they aren’t always the most politically correct store, but they have the best craft supplies in town). I could pick out a wooden box. I could paint it up fancy. I could find a tiny little lock to put on it. I could put the key on my keychain as a reminder that the worries are locked way and I am safe from them during the day. I should go now—

“But it is Sunday, and they are closed😦 ”

After that I zoned out and quit listening to the audio and kept envisioning the awesome box I would make. I liked the idea so much that I started writing down my worries on little slips of paper and trapping them in a box that night. I just had to use a cigar box for a substitute until I could get something better.

I had to work the first part of Monday, and I had promised my mother that I would take her shopping after that. So, I made it to Hobby Lobby and got my things picked out and was waiting in line at closing time.

It almost looks like an old radio in this picture.

It almost looks like an old radio in this picture.

The box I liked did not have a way to put a lock on it and they didn’t sell them there anyway. But the closure fits pretty snugly, so I think those evil suckers will have a problem if they try to pop out of there. My son, the soon-to-be kindergartner, was of course asking me questions. He was so intrigued by the idea (as much as a five year old can be) that he picked out his own box to decorate. He picked out some scrapbooking letters and told me he wanted to use them to put the words “not today” on his box. I thought it was an excellent idea! Of course, he changed his mind by the time he got home, but I liked the idea so much that I used it for myself. I thought it was a very deep observation for a child. Or maybe it is just because it was my child.

Cares, cares away. Never to return.

Cares, cares away. Never to return.

I wanted to paint the box so that just by looking at it, you would not be able to tell that it was made of wood. I mostly succeeded, except I need  to buy some new paint before I can do the bottom. (I wondered why my craft paint was clumpy—some dates back to 1999!) I painted the inside black, to keep those worries calm and quiet. The top & front I painted black and brown, with some gold & silver accents. I made up my own saying for the lid, then translated it into Latin using the Google translator, because the words in Latin just seemed like they would hold more power, sort of reminding me of spells like in the 90s movie The Craft. And if you are a Latin scholar and it doesn’t make sense, don’t write to me. I didn’t use Google for a permanent tattoo, only for a wooden box I keep in my bedroom closet that no one else but me will see. The sides I painted with a mix of brown with red, blue, and purple, respectively, because I could not resist adding some color.

My son's box. He doesn't put his worries in it. He just wanted to paint it.

My son’s box. He doesn’t put his worries in it. He just wanted to paint it.

I am hoping the worry box and the love bubble will be a winning combination. If nothing else, I got to enjoy arts & crafts with my son. Soon he will be all crabby from being at school all day and not interested.

Oh, I almost forgot to show you these cool earrings I made. Sorry, I don’t have a picture where they are not attached to my head.

So retro!

So retro!

Follow the romantic entanglements of The Riley Sisters in my books:
Be Careful What You Wish ForAVAILABLE NOW!
When You Least Expect It THE CONTINUING ROMANCE!
The Wind Could Blow a BugWHERE IT ALL BEGAN!

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The Love Bubble

I think I had an epiphany Thursday morning on my way to work.

LOVE BUBBLE-Soap

Now, for awhile I have tried positive thinking, which is a continuous struggle with every thought that runs through my head, usually resulting in a weekend breakdown from all the tension that feels like it has built up within my brain and heart and body. Usually, I just give up and return to my default hopelessness, because it is comfortable like a worn pair of jeans, but uncomfortable in that way that your worn jeans are too worn and have a hole in the butt that gives you a draft and make you feel like you are on display for the world.

You know, like that.

Books and apps just haven’t seem to have been working for me. But this morning I came up with a visualization.

Not like a beach sunset or cool woods kind of visualization.

I am so tired of feeling like everyone is constantly judging me. I worry what my coworkers think, my neighbors, other drivers. I worry if I am hurting their feelings or making them mad or just generally repulsing them with my ugliosity. I wished with all my might that I had a way to block that (perceived) judgement out.

So, I came up with the love bubble.

I know, it sounds like some kind of sex toy.

It is a pulsating lavender/pink transparent bubble I imagine around my body. (If it was not transparent, then I would constantly be bumping into things, more than I already do now.) It has a selective membrane to block out all the things I would normally worry about. If they can’t get into my bubble, then I am not required to think about them! But I didn’t want to be closed off from the world, so I decided that love could reach me, and my love can reach people, animals, things on the outside, if they need it and are receptive. I have only been using this for like two hours as I am writing this, but so far I kind of like it. I have trouble remembering words and mantras. A picture sticks with me longer. I must be a visual person. And after all, a picture is worth a thousand words.

So, here is my crude illustration:

Here I am, inside my bubble!

Here I am, inside my bubble!

I picture my love bubble being similar to Bella’s shield from Breaking Dawn-Part 2, but it is resides about the same distance away from me as my personal space. It is really the same emotional concept my green-haired friend came up with many years ago, except hers involved a hoodie. On days she didn’t feel like talking to people, she would wear a hooded sweatshirt, putting up the hood and wrapping her arms around herself, to protect herself from the outside world, just like a cocoon would.

Just because we grow up and have jobs doesn’t mean we actually want to crawl out of our blanket forts or leave our security blankets at home and interact with other humans.

Go ahead, try the bubble. But you can’t share mine; get your own.

Follow the romantic entanglements of The Riley Sisters in my books:
Be Careful What You Wish ForAVAILABLE NOW!
When You Least Expect It THE CONTINUING ROMANCE!
The Wind Could Blow a BugWHERE IT ALL BEGAN!

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REMINDER: LOVE YOURSELF

I wanted a simple, to the point post this week. So, here it is. A little chalk art I made recently.

LOVE YOURSELF

LOVE YOURSELF

And not in a dirty way, you perv. Unless, well, that helps you to love and accept yourself more, I guess go at it.

And here is a quote I found the other day that sort of expands on my two word statement, in case it isn’t clear what I mean or what my mission is. I guess some people out there maybe don’t need reminding about this. (I don’t actually KNOW any of those people.)

"By doing the work to love ourselves more, I believe we will love each other better." - Laverne Cox

“By doing the work to love ourselves more, I believe we will love each other better.” – Laverne Cox

Follow the romantic entanglements of The Riley Sisters in my books:
Be Careful What You Wish ForAVAILABLE NOW!
When You Least Expect It THE CONTINUING ROMANCE!
The Wind Could Blow a BugWHERE IT ALL BEGAN!

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The Automated DJ Has Left the Building

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Located at Point Iroquois Lighthouse, Lake Superior

Located at Point Iroquois Lighthouse, Lake Superior

The other day I turned on my weather radio so I could listen to it (or zone out, as is usually the case) while I folded laundry, as I usually do.

I was in for a rude awakening.

The voice on my weather radio was just not the same.

Now, let me give you some background, some history.

I have a habit of obsessing about the voices that come out of my radio. For more background, click here. Listening for a DJ I like to back announce a song is sometimes just as good as waiting for a favorite song. I still remember the names of some of them I listened to 25 years ago. I have looked up their Facebook pages and befriended them. One of them even stalks me (who know who you are). This phenomenon was partially responsible for me studying radio and TV production in college. I have a story outline based off of one of them I wrote years ago, and someday soon I will fill it in with actual nouns and adjectives and verbs and junk. When a favorite DJ would leave a station (which they frequently do, a good reason for me not to go into that line of work), I would get very depressed.

This is what happened with my weather station.

Well, sort of.

I had gotten used to the old voice. He was friendly and reliable and reasonably easy to understand…for a computer.

Yes. I admit it. As I felt depression crushing me as I listened to the stranger on my radio station, I realized it was true. I had become attached to a voice coming through my radio that I was fully aware was automated all along. When I was first researching a weather radio before I purchased one ten years ago (Ya, I’m a giant nerd.),  I found on the NWS website where they blatantly tell you all about the various versions and upgrades on their voices.

I don’t like this new voice. It is too smooth. For a sample, click here. I liked that the old one stumbled over a few words now and then, sort of a digital pixelated hiccup. Even computers are allowed to mess up sometimes. We are only human, right? Oh, wait…

I even messaged my local weather service office in Pontiac, MI to find out what they changed. Their response:

We switched over to a new digital broadcasting system. The old system was the Console Replacement System (CRS) and the new one is the Broadcast Message Handler (BMH).

That means they went from the voice named Tom to the voice named Paul (There was also another Paul several years ago.). I am sure it is faster and will save more lives in an emergency and blah, blah, blah. But I will miss Tom dearly.

Unlike other DJs, it is unlikely I will find him up and down the dial.

Oh, did I mention that I am watching WKRP in Cincinnati these days. Probably the rest of the formula to why I wanted to study radio.

Have you seen that Dr. Johnny Fever?

Johnny freaks out over a tornado on WKRP in Cincinnati.

Johnny freaks out over a tornado on WKRP in Cincinnati.

Follow the romantic entanglements of The Riley Sisters in my books:
Be Careful What You Wish ForAVAILABLE NOW!
When You Least Expect It THE CONTINUING ROMANCE!
The Wind Could Blow a BugWHERE IT ALL BEGAN!

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Foto Phriday

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I haven’t done one of these in a long time. I didn’t have much to download here this week, but then luckily my dog did something cute.

My furry daughter Dave leads a challenging life. She wants to lay between the three outside doors on the first floor, so that she can protect us from every direction. But, well, there is the issue of my son and most of the Island Of Sodor in her way.

What is a girl to do?

She simply lays down in the middle of it, complete with her lip resting on a homemade buffer. She gets  a nap and achieves maximum cuteness at the same time.

Note the buffer at the end of the line, and the furry lip that rests atop it.

Note the buffer at the end of the line, and the furry lip that rests atop it.

Want details on my buffer-building adventures? Check out these links.

DIY Thomas & Friends Buffer

What I Learned This Week – 8/9/15

Extra points if you can spot the Barfey in the picture. (Don’t worry, that is a spare. The originals hang out on a very high shelf out of reach of the child.)

Follow the romantic entanglements of The Riley Sisters in my books:
Be Careful What You Wish ForAVAILABLE NOW!
When You Least Expect It THE CONTINUING ROMANCE!
The Wind Could Blow a BugWHERE IT ALL BEGAN!

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